It's hard to refuse an offer of a drink without seeming to reject someone's hospitality. We have family staying with us this week, and I worry that I'm withdrawing from the festivities and not honoring them if I don't have a drink with them. It's hard also not to offer someone a drink and still feel like a good host.

If I were acting out of moral conviction about the evils of alcohol I might not feel this embarrassment. I am acting instead out of a sense of curiosity and of personal challenge. Now I see that abstaining from alcohol for an extended period will require some readjustments in my social interactions.

One makes decisions for oneself, but then commitments must be played out in social settings. Therefore, part of the resolve to change behavior should include discussion with those in one's social circle, for they will have the power to reinforce or undermine the commitment one has made personally. I made my decision in secret to the surprise of those who have served me drinks in the past.